"Brown Out" during the Night Shift

I'm not sure why Filipinos call a power outage a brown out. When the power goes out in the Philippines, there isn't even a little power coming through. There is simply no power. Last night while at work at the clinic, we had a "brown out."

Thankfully my patient delivered ~30 minutes before the delivery room went dark (and I might add that she delivered ~30 minutes after I arrived and was told she was only 4 centimeters dilated and not in active labor! Just goes to show you should never think you know how fast or how slow a woman will have her baby. And you better listen when a woman says she's needs to push. At least there is usually a very clear difference between a 'i think maybe i need to push' urge and the urge that can. not. be. stopped. That baby is coming! Can you say 'precipitous labor'!?). It was already oppressively hot. Accompany that with the loss of the electric fan and the sweat that was already beading on my forehead quickly began pouring down my face as well as every bodily crevice. Breathable cotton undergarments? That don't make no difference when they're drenched, child. Believe you me.

Ode to hot season in the Philippines

There is a heat the rest of the year that becomes bearable. That not when it's summertime in the Philippines. The word hot takes on new meaning. "I don't remember it being this bad last year!" Oh how quickly we forget.

Summertime.

When you daydream about a city-sized dehumidifier. When the aircon barely makes a dent and the electric fan becomes a must add-on. When you uncharacteristically desire a walk by the river on a windy winter day in Saskatoon. When you lose your mind with disgust for your present stickiness and plan your days to stay close to home and that "cold" shower. When the cold shower isn't cold anymore!!! When you resort to drinking salt water to replace the massive salty water loss. When you can drink 4 glasses of water in 15 minutes and still not have the urge to pee! When looking on the bright side has you thinking, "I must at least be sweating out some toxins!"

Our brown out, which lasted about an hour afforded me the unique opportunity to suture in a very romantic setting - by candle light. The only thing is, you can't get the light source very close to the patient or you will sacrifice the sterile field (or light your patient on fire). Thankfully we also had a small flashlight and an extra visiting volunteer to hold it while I sutured. This was a first for me. The power came on just as I was tying off so I was able to inspect the stitches clearly to ensure I did a decent enough job. Success.

Our patient is positive for hepatitis B but did not prepare the essential immunoglobulin injection for her baby after months of reminders. They simply didn't have the money. And the clinic just so happened to be out of hepatitis B vaccine, which all babies get. When the clinic is out of hepa-B vaccine it usually reflects a city or province-wide shortage as sometimes even the Department of Health is "out of stock." Nice. This baby first needed the hepatitis B vaccine injection, to be followed by the immunoglobulin 6-12 hours later.

What to do? We sent the patient's husband out to look for the vaccine with borrowed money from the clinic. The patient and her husband only had 500 pesos (~$11) to their name. It was after 10 pm. He didn't come back till after 11:30 reporting the pharmacies he went to were out of stock. This baby really needed this vaccine.

Thankfully I had my car. He and I went to seven different pharmacies before we found the vaccine. It took over an hour, driving all around town to find it. Thank God we did.

That was my first shift since the end of March (what a way to come back to work!) and my last 12-hour shift in a while. We are trying out a new schedule format next month with 8-9 hour shifts. At least then I will be showering off 9 hours of unimpeded sweat instead of 12. I wonder if I will notice a difference.

Getting Ready for Baby

Since we found out that we'll only have a few weeks after getting the call till we can pick up our child, we've been in serious baby preparation mode. We've been working on a few house projects getting our new room (we'll be moving into the guest bedroom that adjoins to the baby room) ready, as well as the baby room and the bathroom that connects the two rooms. We've added shelves, re-grouted tiles, replaced parts of the wood floor and old wall panels. We installed a hand bidet (which will double as a diaper sprayer). Once these projects are done we'll move into our new room and will be able to get the baby room all set up with the crib/toddler bed we bought. Then we'll get the shelves organized and filled with what we have for a child of unknown age, size, and gender. So what does one buy for such an unknown child? Things like clothes can not be bought yet but there are plenty of other things we've been able to prepare. This has served as a welcome distraction during our waiting.

On our recent trip the US, we were able to bring back LOTS of baby stuff that I either ordered, shopped for, or was given by grandparents, aunts & uncles. I can't remember being so excited about stuff before!

Andrey doesn't get this but when I buy something new I love to show him what I got. Since you are all so far away (you, being all the ladies in my life that would actually be interested in this), I will do a little show and tell here. And perhaps it will serve as a list to other adopted parents of things they can prepare prior to know the exact age/gender of their child.

Diapers

I've decided to try out two systems. Pocket diapers and prefolds with covers.

• 14 one-size pocket diapers, Babyland brand. They came with 28 inserts.

• A dozen cotton prefolds - size medium
  

• Two Thirsties diaper covers - size medium (for 15-30 pounds, which should cover an average baby from 6 months to 2 years)

• Two Bummis Super Whisper Wraps - size medium

• I also got a couple of nylon pull on pants (super cheap) that I figured were worth a try. I read some use them as extra protection for over night.
  

• I also bought this adorable little swim diaper. I bought a baby blue long-sleeved swim top (also called a rash guard) to go with it. It only came in a size for age 1 but I couldn't pass it up. If it's too small for our child, we'll give it to our adorable niece Annika.
  

Diaper accessories

• Diaper pail liner - Planet Wise. I got two so I have another to use while the one is in the wash with the dirty diapers.
  

• Dirty diaper bags - for travel
  

Natural Baby Co. - holds 2-3 diapers, great for short day trips

Planet Wise wet/dry bag - holds ~20 diapers, for overnight trips

• Snappi diaper fasteners - for the prefolds
  

• Bummis Bio-Soft flushable liners - biodegradable inserts for use inside diapers so solids are easily flushed away. I have a few friends who really like using these.
  

• Cloth baby wipes - My Aunt and my Mom made me dozens of cloth wipes. The photo here is what my Aunt made - all from leftover fabric she had lying around. With what my mom made (she made me some wipes out of soft sherpa fabric, which is so soft!), I think we are covered as far as wipes and washcloths go. They also stocked us up on some very cute burp rags. Thanks Mom and Jan!

• Diaper bag - Skip Hop Deluxe Duo. I asked Andrey if this print was neutral enough for him to not mind carrying. He agreed at the time but I now wonder if it is neutral enough. Too late now. I just love this print and it will go with everything and will double as a purse as well.
  

Toiletries

• Diaper rash cream, body wash/shampoo, baby wipe spray and some supplies to make my own (witch hazel, tea tree oil, lavender...), spray-on sunblock for kids, nail clippers

Medicine

• Last year I stocked up on a few herbal remedies for kids. Cough syrup, boo boo spray, immune support. These are things I can't just run out for when I have a sick kid. Of course we have pharmacies here with plenty of allopathic remedies but I'd like to do what I can with herbs first before I resort to pharmaceuticals.
  

Crib Bedding

• My brothers and sisters-in-law in Florida gave us two organic cotton fitted crib sheets in light brown and beige and a waterproof crib mattress cover, which I love. (Thank you Paul, Laura, Luke & Tonya!!)
  
• I bought a few light-weight receiving blankets in these prints
  

Feeding Supplies

• Sets of BPA-free plastic plates, bowls, travel containers for snacks, and a sippy cup with handles
  
• Kleen Kanteen water sippy (They come in different colors but I got stainless to match my adult version water bottle that I use everyday. So silly but I don't care. I love things that match.)
  

Baby Carriers

• Moby Wrap: My mother-in-law bought this for me about 4 years ago. Thanks, Mom! I can't wait to put your second grandchild in it! Although it does look a little warm - maybe I can use it when we go to Canada :-)
  

• Ergot Baby Carrier - Dear friends Colleen and Taj (Thanks ladies!!) pitched in to help me buy this carrier. I've had so many friends tell me how much they love theirs. I got one in chocolate brown.
  

Books: Thanks to our gracious parents, aunts, uncles and cousins, we have LOTS of children's books. I love the stock we are creating. Will need to get a book shelf for them. I'm going to start looking for some adoption-related story books, too. I've heard of some great ones out there. Thank you Moms, Mike, Lisa, Kit, Allen, Brenda, Wayne, Mairin, Alex, Graham, Joel & Katya!

We also have been given by our parents, Andrey's grandmother and cousins an assortment of knitted blankets, quilts (Andrey's mom made us a gorgeous quilt big enough for a double bed - amazing!), and hand-crocheted/knitted stuffed animals. Thank you Katya. Thank you Grandma. Thank you, Mom. We are so blessed!!

Things we plan to buy after we get matched

• Stroller & Car seat - will have the first grandparents who visit bring these from the States (much cheaper!)
  
• Feeding booster - can buy here
• Baby monitor - depending on age of child, can buy here
• Pack 'n Play?
  
• Clothes (of course!) - can't wait till I can buy clothes!
  
• A few toys
  
• Safety supplies (plastic socket covers and stuff like that - not exactly sure what else we'll need)

Am I forgetting anything?

In adoption time-line news, I recently heard that the Philippines Adoption Board is extending wait times from up to 24 months to up to 30 months. I know of two other couples, who like us don't have any kids yet (childless families usually get priority over those with other children). One has been waiting 22 months without a match, the other 21. Of course we have no idea what will happen but we're thinking it will more likely be toward the end of this year. We were told a wait time of 12-24 months but other families were told 18-24 months and most recently 18-30 months. May 8 will be 17 months for us.

Family Time Photos

We had a wonderful week in Virginia with family. Naturally, there are a LOT of photos of our newest niece, Annika. I told you she was cute!

Adoption Stories

This past weekend at the conference we attended I was blown away by the many people I met who have adopted internationally. It felt like all the adoptive families were coming out of the woodwork to find me and tell me their story and that they are praying for us. I felt so blessed and encouraged.

Two stories in particular, really encouraged me. (I won't go into much detail as I haven't asked permission to share their stories.)

I met a woman, similar age to me, married a similar number of years, no biological children, who adopted internationally a year ago. She and her husband went to the Eastern Europe planning to bring home two children and ended up with four. Her story was rich with joy and thankfulness for what God has done. Meeting her reminded me to remain open to whatever the Lord has for us in this adoption - be it one or two (or more!) children. This came at a good time as I have been stressing out lately about the idea of two children, not feeling sure I'm ready for it if it happens. Her story has put this in perspective for me. Meeting her was great as she's the first adoptive mother I'm met that doesn't already have a biological child. I could really relate to her.

Andrey and I were introduced to an American couple who struggled for years to have a baby. They have endured a huge amount of loss in their journey to become parents. They shared with us how they were presented with a choice between continuing to pursue fertility or applying for a job that may take them overseas to a country where fertility specialists are not available. They prayed and made the difficult decision to relinquish their hopes of a successful pregnancy in order to follow where they felt God was leading them. Not long after, they were shocked to learn that she had become pregnant for the first time without the help of fertility treatment and she is currently well into her pregnancy. A total miracle! Even though I was meeting this couple for the first time I couldn't help but tear up when I heard their story. I was overwhelmed by God's faithfulness. We then shared a bit of our story with them and they prayed for us and our desire to become parents, which really blessed us. Another divine connection.

These are just a few experiences from this past weekend that served to remind us that our Creator is so involved in every detail of our lives and our hopes for a family. It confirmed to me that we are exactly where we are meant to be. There is much more to share but the point is that when we release our deep desires to God and let him bring about his purpose in our lives in his timing and in his way, there is a greater joy and blessing in it than if we hold tightly to our plans and make them happen in our own strength. I can't wait to see what the Lord is going to do!

Trust in the Lord with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding
In all your ways acknowledge him
and he will direct your paths
Proverbs 3:5-6

Quick Update

We flew to the D.C. area last week. We come here every year to attend the annual meeting/conference/retreat related to Andrey's work. The actual work-related events last about nine days in total for Andrey and involve me for about five of those. We usually tack on about a week in order to spend some time with family who travel to the area to see us. This year, Andrey's parents have arranged for us to stay in a cabin in Virginia with Andrey's sister, her husband and their new baby, Annika. It is just plain wrong to move on to the next paragraph without a word or twenty about Annika.

The first grandchild for Andrey's parents, Annika has been referred to as "the joy bringer." As we have gotten to know her this past week, I think this description is the most fitting of this five-month-old little girl. We loved her long before we met her for the first time in person this week. She is, we think and declare proudly, the cutest baby ever (no offense to other babies out there!). She seeks out eye contact and smiles at any of us who come near. She is the picture of health - chunky thighs, double chin, delicious skin, rosy fat cheeks, and bright eyes (gorgeous ocean-blue) and a smile that turns you to mush. And that hair! She has a ton of hair that is endearingly a borderline baby mullet. Precious, long-prayed-for, rejoiced over, joyful, bright, genuinely happy, content, secure, well-loved. These are a few adjectives that come to mind after spending just a few days with this little joy bringer. Mike and Lisa have agreed to let me post a few pics of her, which I plan to do once I am working on a computer that has both my photos on it and access to the internet. That will have to wait for now but I just want to say that it is so refreshing to be around a baby like Annika. Her parents are doing an excellent job at caring for her.

This weekend, my mom and aunt will join us. They are bringing lots of baby stuff with them, including more than a few home made cloth baby wipes. They both love to sew and were asking me what kind of stuff they could make. I can't wait to see what they brought! I began listing all the baby prep activities we were up to prior to this trip but decided it's best to devote a separate post to that.

Tomorrow we drive to the city, where we'll be till we leave on the 17th. I won't have access to the internet very often while in the hotel so I'll be out of touch for at least the next few days.

Tomorrow also marks 16 months of waiting since our approved adoptive parents status came to be. We are quickly approaching the average 18 months wait from approval to match but I regularly hear of families who wait much longer than the average. For instance, I recently read on the adoption group we belong to about a few families who are waiting 22 or more months and counting. I just wish I knew even a ball-park figure of how much longer. A couple of months more? Another 6 months? Unfortunately with adoption the long sought-after hour can not be known. All I know is each day brings us closer. Each day gives me more time to get my shit together. More time for learning perserverence and patience, I suppose. I should have plenty of character by the end of this wait. And then the true challenge and growth begins. The challenge of parenting a child I know nothing about, who will come to us with their own personality, experiences, hurts, uniqueness, quirks. That will present joys and challenges of its own. Maybe I'm okay with waiting a little while longer. All I really want is about another month to get the baby room organized. Of course I'll be happy if we got the call tomorrow but getting a few things organized will help reduce my anxiety level, which is worth a lot to me given the big unknown we are headed for.